When I was in college, two of my close friends got pregnant unexpectedly. At first, both tried to continue with their studies but as time went by, the pressures of being pregnant and homework took a toll on them and they decided to just quit school and focused on their growing bellies.
After a few years, one of them decided to continue with her studies while the other opted to become a full-time housewife. Both are happy with their chosen paths, but not without regrets and difficulties along the way.
I may not know what they went through during those times, but every time we see each other, they always tell me that life has a funny way of making you grow up. These girls, who I’ve known all my life, didn’t experience any hardships growing up. When they had their babies, I didn’t know that they had it in them to be mothers, let alone raise a family.
That was 15 years ago. Now, they tease me that it’s about time I should have my own family. My answer’s always been the same. “I’m not in a hurry”. When we’re together, it’s as if they’re making up for lost time. I guess because only now that they can actually get free from their responsibilities at home. Their children are already in high school and they’re actually living a comfortable life.
But my friends are lucky. Most unwanted pregnancies don’t always have a happy ending. In a survey conducted by the National Statistical Coordination Board, 23% of Filipino teens are engaging in pre-marital sex therefore causing not just unwanted pregnancies, but also a risk of getting sexually-transmitted diseases.
Not every girl who gets pregnant can face this kind of responsibility. And sometimes, they just don’t want to. It’s a bitter fact. If I may be blunt here, but most kids these days can be a little bit selfish. They like to think that they can do everything, but they tend to forget that their actions have consequences.
I hate it when pregnant teens cry and say that they’re not ready yet to be parents that’s why they’re choosing abortion or giving up their kids for adoption. If you’re ready to have sex, you should be ready too with everything that comes with it. I’m not advocating anything here, but it takes a lot of maturity to do grown-up stuff, and if you think that you can’t handle it, then don’t do anything stupid.
An hour of pleasure is not worth a lifetime of misery. A child is always a gift, but that gift shouldn’t be abused or better yet taken for granted. Yes, I pity those girls whose parents can’t accept this kind of situation, but what I pity most is the kid inside the mother’s womb who will suffer the consequences of these people’s actions.
I don’t like that fact that my friends got pregnant at an early age and that their education and dreams were put to a halt because of it. But I’m proud of them for not giving up and facing their problems head on. When things got rough for them, they kept on going. They transferred to a new “school,” learning more about the depth of life since they started raising their kids.
This post was written by Rita Salonga.